“Ah, Perry the platypus!”
“What an unexpected -“
“WAIT, WAIT, WAIT!”
“By societal convention!”
“Look! We’re in a fine dining environment. Everyone knows not to throw a scene in a fancy restaurant!”
“That’s right. You’re trapped. Sit down.”
Jake’s mom is a total badass
i bet he sells … quack
- accept that no pun is actually Good, but that the true nature of a good pun is to be so terrible that it becomes good.
- say every pun that occurs to you. i’m so serious about this, sometimes the most well received puns will be ones you considered not saying.
- ALWAYS laugh at your own puns, even if nobody else is. (especially if nobody else is.)
- know that you are hilarious. puns are a limitless resource and you have taken it as your duty to bring this gift to humanity. you are a hero.
kissing is great
but wow when you get to kiss someone you have feelings for and you’ve wanted to kiss them for the longest time and you get to stroke their face and you’re so aware of their body and how nice their lips feel